good day my Mistress…just wanted to check in Maam, may You have a lovely weekend coming up.
apologizing for the length of this… late last night i was reading shelley's latest comment on Your blog forum. she spoke of learning servitude and the distinction between being in a physical presence versus the purely mind aspect of your direction and obedience femme training in an online experience with our Dominatrix Camille.
those who study the world of thought have concluded the average person has approximately 40,000 thoughts per day with 4,000 being conscious. 90% are the same as the day before.
i think about 'YOU' so much throughout my day.
it is like a pink wave of influence over taking much of my thoughts and feelings. i have discarded so many superfluous thoughts and actions i use to have replacing them with elements of feminine expression, feelings and thoughts.
though i have been busier at work i move about my day thinking about You quite often and i look at things as though I am becoming the kind of gurl You want of me.
addressing the physical aspects for a moment though i don’t do it as much because funds are low when i go through stores i look at clothing and makeup and other feminine items and accessories and think about how i can incorporate them into my life moving forward as Your gurl.
no longer using televised sports as the male pacifier they are at home I operate as though I already am becoming a trans-woman. that is a direct result from Your powerful influence over Your gurl alyssa and her mind.
i sleep in bed with my training corset on and 3” hoop earrings in. I practice when I can with my make up. i use my nipple suckers and breast pumps (though my boobies don’t stay increased in size for long).
The most noticeable change is in my nipples, they have acquired a different texture and sensation to them. they are more pronounced in appearance and sensitivity an often can be seen poking outward against my shirt.
After discussing with a ‘makeup specialist’ i bought a facial enhancer that has helped to reduce puffiness, dark spots and skin tone lines. i try to shave my face twice a day to keep it smoother. I use the coconut oil every 3rd or 4th day. At home I keep my toenails polished and colored while keeping my fingernails manicured as long as i think i can get away with at work.
moving into month 6 under Your direction i walk in heels at home so much i am starting to walk more from my hips. i have gradually acquired a feminine appearance to my facial expression most of the time. it is enough of a change that when outside it has gotten bemused if not curious looks from both males and Females who recognize it for what it is.
yet it is my mind that is being most influenced by you Maam. You are bringing me to a place where my thoughts come from a feminine space i didn’t realize existed as much as it does within me. For that i am grateful and it will no doubt add to me better accepting myself in the coming months and years as Your slave gurl in-training.
Your pet, alyssa
Dear Alyssa ,
Thank you darling for your letter and i note all that you say . So far i have been much encouraged by this site and the experienced wisdom it expresses and future it presents for you and the girls .
I transitioned in 2004 courtesy of our NHS ( breasts , hormones and all that ,no charge ) Always alone I work hard at this my life and am pleased with where i am at. Sacrifises were inevitable but we are driven and for some it is more than becoming girls .Bluntly my nature drives me to be taken as a slave ,so far to no avail . So i travel on and love meeting you and the others here.
After much deliberation i kept my clitty and while i may still have it done .I know that decision would be for my superior if i was in such a life situation .
I will make application to Mistress DLC and such .
Meantime noting how our nakedness is normal i attach a wee photo for you Alissa and others
Helena Cissy H
thank you for the kind words cissy. i luv your look if i may say. your point about connecting with Mistress years before has given me pause enough to think of what may have been.
certainly Mistress Darklady deserves at minimum a huge shout out of gratitude for all Her work she's put into in creating Her site. i doubt there is another site so comprehensive in its attention to detail for t-gurls like us. in the mean time i shall 'carry on' and to as i am told by my beautiful Dominatrix Camille. peace, alyssa
As a new girl to all thisForum stuff , i am just feeling my way around here .
However i am a time served Trans Sexual so can well understand Alyssa 'situation and wish i had been taken by Mistress Darklady Camile years ago . Alyssa i know i do not need to remind you how very fortunate you are under Mitress,s ownership .
Your report was jolly interesting to me and i wish you strength and continued determination .
Sincerely loves ,